A difficult season

My frequency of contacts with others diminished drastically over the events of 2024. Toward the end of last year, I reached a psychological stage called burnout. This is a key reason for not seeing posts on this blog in over a month. The events are difficult to describe, but these include going through divorce, professional retirement, sudden change of residence, and several challenges with well-being and mobility.

But I think I'm fairly resilient. I'm comfortable in my skin and happy in my place. I have been spending the last few weeks getting on top of these challenges of well being and going through a myriad of appointments for my right foot ulcerated wound, my eye condition (macTel2), dental complications, my blood sugars, mental health, etc. This was a necessary focused effort for me which is largely in good shape. My Complex PTSD was amplified with the events of last year and a constant challenge. But I'm in pretty good shape in all and focused on healing always.

Another reason for a slowdown of activity is that right now I am re-tooling my production in some significant ways. The transition from Windows to Apple is a piece of this, but a big piece of this is upgrading software in my other production tools, primarily working with the latest Musescore software.

I did connect with Kai Cofer, my playwright just before Christmas and I'm keeping a regular appointment with my composing teacher and mentor John Muehleisen. But I also have 3 doctors telling me to really slow down my activities for a few weeks and focus on healing, staying off my toe, and keeping my blood sugars and pressure low. My mental health counselor says to take my foot off the gas (actually I drive an EV, no gas). So I'm embracing burnout and some occasional loneliness. Knocking out the Alphasongs 2.0 website was a lot of work that I did completely myself.

But Journaling is also an important prescription for my mental health and I'm committed to getting back to that more. Expect some more posting frequency soon. Matthew